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littlebluedog
littlebluedog
Tim
Wednesday, March 5th, 2008 07:37 am
no room

This battle, like far too many, is fought with words not said.

I go to the same place just about every morning. Each time, I ask for no room in my coffee. But then I pour a little out to put my milk in. They see me do this, so the next time I ask for no room in my coffee, they don't fill it up all the way. After all, they probably reason, he's just going to pour some out.

It's not really a matter of principle (yet). It's just that I prefer to have control over all of the ingredients in my morning coffee.

In other words, because I am an inexplicable cheapskate in some circumstances, and because I want my coffee-and-milk concoction to fill the whole cup, I will add milk until the cup is full, even if it ends up being more than my preferred ratio. Really, I can't help it. Sometimes, if I have to top up a few ounces, I'll use skim milk instead, and then my coffee is all watery, and then nobody's happy.

I wonder idly about whether it might be a good idea to discuss, with my team of regular baristas, the relative costs of additional labor to dispose of garbage that has a few more splashes of liquid in it versus the comparative expense of dairy product to brewed coffee, in order to somehow prove that when I ask for no room, I should get no room ... but the same effort-to-benefit analysis I'd employ in such a discussion leads me to conclude that it's probably better to say nothing and keep fighting this fight.

You can't choose some battles, but you can still figure out how to achieve a truce. Some things work out like that, I guess.

38CommentReplyShare

sistermaryeris
sistermaryeris
Bake, Love, Kickbox.
Wednesday, March 5th, 2008 04:06 pm (UTC)

I have a plan for you!

Order the size you want, but order an extra cup? I dunno. Perhaps there is no answer to your insanity.

Hehe. :)


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littlebluedog
littlebluedog
Tim
Wednesday, March 5th, 2008 04:10 pm (UTC)

What is the extra cup for?

Are you drunk?


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drjeff
drjeff
Raoul Duke
Wednesday, March 5th, 2008 04:13 pm (UTC)

This may well be the Timmiest TimPost evar. :)


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littlebluedog
littlebluedog
Tim
Wednesday, March 5th, 2008 04:18 pm (UTC)

Hahaha, in-depth and comprehensive analysis of life's minutiae, that's what the Blue Dog Blog is famous for.


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grrlpup
grrlpup
Holly
Wednesday, March 5th, 2008 04:17 pm (UTC)

Stand there and sip some black coffee and think about the bitterness of life. Then add your milk.


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littlebluedog
littlebluedog
Tim
Wednesday, March 5th, 2008 04:22 pm (UTC)

Absolute genius. That's not a light bulb of an idea, that is blinding rays of brilliance from a sunrise exploding over the peaks a vast mountain range.


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inkytwist
inkytwist
The Loch Ness Monster
Wednesday, March 5th, 2008 04:19 pm (UTC)

My Dad fights this battle every day, too. We get Americanos in the family, so the deal is that the extra bit of hot water makes the espresso less strong, and then he pours a little out to add creme. It's funny how people can become so ingrained in what they get at the coffee shop, no?

Then again, I am a -hot chocolate- person.


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littlebluedog
littlebluedog
Tim
Wednesday, March 5th, 2008 04:39 pm (UTC)

I should convert to hot chocolate.

Do you know which coffee places in town give you the hot water separately when you order an Americano?


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horror_romance
horror_romance
mega mega mega awesome babe
Wednesday, March 5th, 2008 04:20 pm (UTC)

hello dude! as you know, i have been a barista for over 5 years. i do not even ask people if they want room in their coffee and i ALWAYS give them room. why? because i don't want them to spill hot coffee on their hands. if someone is really butthurt enough about the extra half-ounce of coffee they're missing out on or whatever, they'll let me know and then i will fill their cup to the brim, as requested, and watch as they spill while they try to put a lid on it. way to go, dorks!

seriously, if you were my regular customer and you always asked for NO ROOM but then poured some out anyway, i'd think you were crazy, hahaha!

you can try to explain to your barista, in detail, why you want it a certain way, but they are probably going to think you are a total weirdo and make fun of you after you leave (which they might already do).

my advice is to find a cafe with self-serve coffee. problem solved!

(stumptown has self-serve coffee, fyi.)


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horror_romance
horror_romance
mega mega mega awesome babe
Wednesday, March 5th, 2008 04:23 pm (UTC)

oh yeah, another good solution to this problem is to indicate with your finger where on the cup you'd like the coffee to go to. saying "no room" or "with room" is kind of like, not very exact, you know? i noticed that someone posted about americanos up above- when people order americanos with room, i always put my finger up to the cup where i think the water should go to, and say "to about here?" if you have your own coffee mug (you should probably just get a travel mug!) you can just hand it to them and point to the exact spot you'd like them to fill it to and say "fill it to about here." that would probably help your solution a lot. then it's not an issue of ROOM, per se, it's just how much coffee you want.


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polarbear
polarbear
No Time For Love, Dr. Jones
Wednesday, March 5th, 2008 04:40 pm (UTC)

People in this town are freaks about their coffee. If you have this conversation with them, you'll either be lumped in with them or simply looked at as normal. ;)


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littlebluedog
littlebluedog
Tim
Wednesday, March 5th, 2008 04:47 pm (UTC)

You're probably right. You know, I admit that it used to be kind of a source of pride that I stick with plain old drip and don't order a quad venti soy mocha light whatever, but I'm just as picky as the folks who order froo-froo drinks.


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littlebluedog
littlebluedog
Tim
Wednesday, March 5th, 2008 06:25 pm (UTC)

I don't know about Americans in general, but folks in Portland and Seattle and at least most of the bigger cities in the Western US can get mighty particular about their coffee.

And then of course I can get mighty particular about anything. :)


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abrichar
abrichar
Amanda
Wednesday, March 5th, 2008 06:47 pm (UTC)

Oh, Tim, this post just makes me adore you all the more.


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boy_asunder
boy_asunder
ryan christopher fox
Wednesday, March 5th, 2008 06:58 pm (UTC)

I don't think the calculus that the baristas care about is the cost of liquidy trash versus extra milk. For them, I think it's the very strong annoyance they have is dealing with liquidy, potentially messy trash versus dairy costs that do not affect them. Thus, to my mind, you should stop pouring hot coffee into the trash, just to be more humane to the baristas.


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littlebluedog
littlebluedog
Tim
Wednesday, March 5th, 2008 07:16 pm (UTC)

I submit that dairy costs certainly affect them, perhaps not in the immediate sense, but wages and supply expenditures are both factors in determining overhead.

Splashing a half-ounce of liquid into the trash is hardly inhumane. :)


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luvsammy
luvsammy
Samalamity
Wednesday, March 5th, 2008 09:56 pm (UTC)

Boy am I glad I don't drink coffee.


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luvsammy
luvsammy
Samalamity
Wednesday, March 5th, 2008 09:57 pm (UTC)

and also, why does your cartoony icon have long, flowy bangs?


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littlebluedog
littlebluedog
Tim
Wednesday, March 5th, 2008 10:06 pm (UTC)

Good point. I made it a few years ago before I transitioned to the uberhawt, ultrashort coif that I sport these days. I'll put "make new LJ coffee icon" on my punch list. :)


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