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help me ride out the last bit of this monday ... - blue dog blog™
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littlebluedog
littlebluedog
Tim
Monday, November 24th, 2008 04:27 pm
help me ride out the last bit of this monday ...

I'd like anyone reading this to make up a completely fictional account of how we met for the first time, either online or IRL.

Or, if the way we actually did meet is so improbable that it sounds fictitious, feel free to put that down instead.

51CommentReply

ataventure
ataventure
Allison
Tuesday, November 25th, 2008 12:40 am (UTC)

It was a dark and stormy, but surprisingly warm evening. I couldn't find a ride to pick you up at the airport, so I pedaled up the mountainous incline that is Airport Road, and you sat on my handlebars. We wobbled unsteadily at breakneck speed back down Airport Road and went directly to the bar. You bought me a couple of beers and we compared bruises. We then sat in front of the fireplace, and I fell asleep.


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littlebluedog
littlebluedog
Tim
Tuesday, November 25th, 2008 12:45 am (UTC)

Oh geez, I remember that. Is that place still even there?


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plaidomatic
plaidomatic
Plaid
Tuesday, November 25th, 2008 12:41 am (UTC)

In the moonlit night of Ceylon, over turkish coffee and french cigarettes, the distant crackle of gunfire was a suggestion of the not-so-distant future. I was running from the junta, looking to make fast cash to bribe my way through the cordons. You were a purveyor of military "surplus."

The stiff cotton tarp covered your wares, I had an age blackened bolt action of uncertain providence, and a mother-of-pearl handled Colt automatic, of all-too-certain providence. The junta colonel wouldn't miss it. That was his blood not quite washed from the engravings, after all.

In the end, the vial of penicillin I had found would fetch me more than both guns, but we would later meet again in the Americas, this time with the situation almost reversed.


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littlebluedog
littlebluedog
Tim
Tuesday, November 25th, 2008 12:47 am (UTC)

You describe it so well that I can almost remember actually being there. Or maybe I'm actually remembering being there. It was so long ago.


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virgoqueen7
virgoqueen7
How Can Be?
Tuesday, November 25th, 2008 01:09 am (UTC)

Twas a dark and stormy night.....

Actually it was Dr. Jeff's Halloween party. You were a very clever Van Gogh portrait...I was a Catholic School Girl. :)
I think it lasted all of 35 seconds since there was a lot going on that night.

"Oh that's LBD? HEY TIM!!!!!" Haha.


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littlebluedog
littlebluedog
Tim
Tuesday, November 25th, 2008 05:02 am (UTC)

Preposterous. This could NEVER happen.


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zind4gi
zind4gi
Bob Sahangin
Tuesday, November 25th, 2008 01:56 am (UTC)
The Gorgax Part 1/2

We were the last of our kind. Special elite military types unknown to the rest of the world and even our respective nations. I was from Killstania and you from the Death Republic. They send us when there is no other hope in the World. Under the cover of darkness, we parachuted into dense jungles of Lassador providence where almost all of our fellow countrymen had parachuted in earlier only to die a painful death at the hands of the Gorgax. See, the origin of the Gorgax was unknown. Some think it was alien in nature, some thing it was a secret govt experiment gone wrong. We'll never know. Our jobs...take it out! The Gorgax was capable of completely devastating entire cities in hours. That's why there is no New Scandor City or Bosleton anymore. And the path of destruction would ultimately lead to the end of the world.

Our countries had partnered in developing secret weapons. Weapons of great exothermic destruction. Able to disintegrate giant high-rises in seconds. Though we weren't sure of what the Gorgax was made it but it couldn't be concrete, right?

We landed at our respective drop points where all terrain octowheelers awaited as. Approximately 100 miles apart, we started to pinpoint the location of the Gorgax and close in on him. It was a horrible path of trees that looked like matchstick, giant holes in the ground, and bodies of our fellow infantry scattered about, many horribly disfigured. The smell was almost unbearable. Soon, I could hear the Gorgax, the gunfire, and the screaming of men, stifled suddenly. And then..there it was. About 20 stories tall, with a horrible smell, and the blood of men on what appeared to be it's feet and hands. I had approached it from the rear but it heard my octowheeler as it ran over some carcasses and turned around.

There it was, the most hideous looking thing I had ever seen. With pinchfork teeth, and red eyes the size of one of the many moons of our world. For a moment, I was awestruck! We looked each other in the eye. From then on, it was a race -- a race to the death. I grabbed the exothermic cannon and powered it up. But....there was a problem. Before I could fire it off, the Gorgax grabbed me. I couldn't move. It was squeezing so hard I felt like my head was going to explode but I managed to keep consciousness. Noone had told me it takes 5 minutes for the exothermic cannot to fully power up. How could they have left such a critical detail out? Oh well, I had no choice. I was going to die here. I managed to aim the cannon right for the head of the Gorgax and fire. The gun was only halfway powered up, but it was enough to hurt the Gorgax. I could feel the most intense heat ray coming out of the cannon. It was like standing next to the sun and then someone was blowing a fan at the sun so that the heat burned. And burn it did, all the hair on my arms was singed. My uniform was burning.

But finally, the exothermic ray hit the Gorgax but the Gorgax had turned his head sideways before the ray hit it. It was enough to hurt the Gorgax and he dropped me. But it was a 60 ft drop and I had not landed properly breaking my legs. I thought for sure the exothermic ray would have killed the Gorgax but it just made the Gorgax angry. You could smell the flesh of the Gorgax burning though. I can't even begin to explain how pewtrid the smell was.


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zind4gi
zind4gi
Bob Sahangin
Tuesday, November 25th, 2008 01:57 am (UTC)
The Gorgax part 2/2

The Gorgax was still able to see though with one of it's eyes that had not been burned into liquid red eyeball juice. And with it now thoroughly pissed off at me, it was about to kill me. I thought this was going to be it. It was a great life I lived though and an honor to die for my planet and my country in this manner. Our kind always died trying. And just then....and that moment when it was about to pick me up so that it could grind my miniscule body into it's jagged-toothed mouth, I heard that sound I had heard earlier --- the sound of the exothermic cannon going off. Except this time it was higher pitched (The sound of a full charge going off as I found out later). And instantly....I mean like in a second...I was covered in black ash up to my head.

Miraculously, I had survived and moments later, you LBD, showed up on your octowheeler to dig me out of the ashes and take me to an emergency airlift that rushed me the hospital in Arcanea.

And that, my friend, is how we met...

Edited at 2008-11-25 02:01 am (UTC)


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littlebluedog
littlebluedog
Tim
Tuesday, November 25th, 2008 05:21 am (UTC)
Re: The Gorgax part 2/2

Guh-DAMN, man, that was impressive, and a hell of a lot more interesting than how we actually did meet, when you drunkenly made a pass at me after I karaoke'd some Kajagoogoo in Aloha. ;)


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tronochick
tronochick
tronochick
Tuesday, November 25th, 2008 02:01 am (UTC)

Not sure if you remember, but we met a few years ago in Los Angeles at xxxx's wedding. We were introduced by our mutual friend xxxx, and spoke for a few minutes about Oregon, which I've visited several times. I hadn't begun law school at that point, but I mentioned that Portland is one of the places I was thinking about in terms of relocating for a job. You mentioned your love of the city and gave me your card.

Well, time flies, and I found myself in interview season in my 3L year at xxxx. I emailed you about wanting to go into family law and tried to interview at your firm for a job after I graduated.

I walked in the door, went up the elevator, and was greeted by you, who thwacked me in the head with a Nerf bat for being such a dumbass.

The end.


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littlebluedog
littlebluedog
Tim
Tuesday, November 25th, 2008 05:02 am (UTC)

Well played. :)


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sistermaryeris
sistermaryeris
Bake, Love, Kickbox.
Tuesday, November 25th, 2008 02:43 am (UTC)

True Story: When we met, it was over dead fish. We spent a lot of time with that dead fish and then you went back to work. Then I took pictures of clouds.


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littlebluedog
littlebluedog
Tim
Tuesday, November 25th, 2008 03:16 am (UTC)

Yup. And I mentioned that I suspected that you were a retired porn star.


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ghost_light
ghost_light
Ghost Light
Tuesday, November 25th, 2008 03:09 am (UTC)

I remember meeting you at that theatre party Freshman year. it was already 2 in the morning, so smoking and playing 'I never' in the girls' locker room was already well underway.

Zippy had just confessed that he had eaten live ants while playing Godzilla as a kid. It was your turn and you admitted that you had never kissed a boy. You should have seen the look on your face when Kevin leaped up to fix that.

Those were the days.


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littlebluedog
littlebluedog
Tim
Tuesday, November 25th, 2008 05:00 am (UTC)

Brilliant! I think every theatre geek in the world was at this exact party. :)

(Hey, friend me on Facebook!)


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inkytwist
inkytwist
The Loch Ness Monster
Tuesday, November 25th, 2008 03:42 am (UTC)

Once I fell into a whole of infinite time and space and you pulled me out of it, using your Cane of Worthwhile Insanity.

Thanks, man.


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littlebluedog
littlebluedog
Tim
Tuesday, November 25th, 2008 04:53 am (UTC)

No worries. I can't count how many times My trusty +2 Cane has come in handy.


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tyreseus
tyreseus
Jere
Tuesday, November 25th, 2008 07:38 am (UTC)

As I recall, we first met when some old guy forced us to take off our shirts and do "the bump" and other homoerotic dance moves. Then you were making out with some sorta-closeted guy in leather.


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littlebluedog
littlebluedog
Tim
Wednesday, November 26th, 2008 12:52 am (UTC)

Yup. Wonder why so many of these involve me being gay?


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(no subject) - (Anonymous) Expand
thatsassylassie
thatsassylassie
thatsassylassie
Tuesday, November 25th, 2008 07:23 pm (UTC)

April 2003, I was in the main ballroom of the Biltmore, waiting in the makeshift "backstage" area fashioned by the organizers of the Miss America pageant. As the contestant before me played a seemingly endless rendition of "Hotel California" on the french horn, I decided to slip out the side door to get a drink. (I was terribly dehydrated from doing jello shots on the sly, all afternoon with Miss Oklahoma.)
You were in an adjacent ballroom attending a conference about patent issues with regard to modern "retro" toys. You opened the door to leave your conference, nearly collided with me and in shock, threw the cup of hot coffee you were holding all over me. My costume ruined, I never returned to the ballroom to perform my submission for the talent contest, "Lady in Red" on the harmonica.

Its okay though, in retrospect, Miss Oregon was enough of an honor, and I was getting a little old for the pageant lifestyle anyway.


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littlebluedog
littlebluedog
Tim
Wednesday, November 26th, 2008 07:45 am (UTC)

Oh my baby. I am so yours forever. :)

Will you play that for me? I feel like my life is so lacking because you haven't yet.


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sage_and_sea
sage_and_sea
If you can't be nice, at least be vague.
Wednesday, November 26th, 2008 12:18 am (UTC)

I bet you a voodoo donut - something about Terri Schaivo, I think - and you lost. You actually showed up at voodoo and bought me and my girl a donut. :)

Improbable but real.


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littlebluedog
littlebluedog
Tim
Wednesday, November 26th, 2008 05:57 pm (UTC)

That's the same night I met oddiophile as well. :)


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fozz47
fozz47
needs better respect for your superiors
Wednesday, November 26th, 2008 12:29 am (UTC)

Your first day doing gay porn. I took it slow and easy, because I knew you were nervous, and I wanted it to be special.


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virgoqueen7
virgoqueen7
How Can Be?
Wednesday, November 26th, 2008 12:37 am (UTC)

Oh god I think I just vomited a little. Haha


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stopword
stopword
Alice
Wednesday, November 26th, 2008 12:48 am (UTC)

I'm surprised you don't recall. We were both dirt poor high school sophomores, but we'd won scholarships to a summer camp for intensive madrigal study. We practiced together night and day and ended up beating out all the snobby students who had private madrigal tutors at home.

I think the extended madrigal montage sequence was my favorite part.


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littlebluedog
littlebluedog
Tim
Wednesday, November 26th, 2008 01:13 am (UTC)

I just know there's a pun in there, but I'm not clever enough to find it!


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brucix
brucix
Non-Sequitur Man
Wednesday, November 26th, 2008 02:27 am (UTC)

We were the only two people at that band audition who knew how to play THE PINK ROOM from Twin Peaks!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W4tDFa_F6WM


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littlebluedog
littlebluedog
Tim
Wednesday, November 26th, 2008 06:00 pm (UTC)

Awesome. I'm a Twin Peaks fan, but I've never heard that song!


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