Tim (littlebluedog) wrote,
Tim
littlebluedog

an exercise in futility and faulty logic

I don't know why I spend my lunch break doing stuff like this, but for some reason I feel satisfied. I'm sure it'll be a fleeting sensation.

December 4, 2008

T-Mobile
ATTN: Ryan Butz, Director
PO Box 4784
Seattle WA 98194-0784

Dear Mr. Butz:

Recently I received a promotional letter expressing appreciation for being a T-Mobile customer, and offering a Samsung t229 phone valued at $89.99 as a service upgrade. The postscript indicates that the upgrade offer ends on November 30, 2008.

I received the letter on December 1, 2008. Also, I canceled my T-Mobile service approximately two months ago.

Prior to canceling, I e-mailed T-Mobile customer service and advised of my plan to cancel, but also indicated that after several years of T-Mobile service, I would be willing to consider remaining a customer, depending on the upgrade packages available. I specifically requested to be contacted with information regarding upgrade packages. After two weeks, I received a short response asking what T-Mobile could do to retain me as a customer. I responded by repeated my request. After another two weeks, another representative responded with one available upgrade promotion. However, by that point, I’d already purchased an iPhone 3G and started service with AT&T/Cingular. As such, I wasn’t impressed by the offer.

After a couple of weeks of AT&T/Cingular service, I decided to port my number from my T-Mobile account. The T-Mobile call representative assisting me mentioned that I might be eligible for a “win-back” promotion, but advised that a representative from a different department would have to call me separately for that, if I was interested. I indicated that I would be interested, but I was never contacted.

Your December 1 letter is probably the third such promotional letter I’ve received in the past two months, but I’ve largely ignored them because they don’t refer to my communications with T-Mobile, acknowledge the fact that I am no longer a customer, and likely offer the lowest-level upgrade promo possible.

I had been a T-Mobile customer for at least four years. I don’t think I ever missed a bill, or complained about service. However, the clumsiness with which T-Mobile has shown me how “valuable” I am to the company is a little insulting if it is expected to woo me back.

If I truly am an appreciated T-Mobile customer, here is what T-Mobile can do to demonstrate this:
  1. Give me a phone that is equivalent or superior to the one I recently purchased, for free. I believe this would be a G1 (preferred) or a Wing.

  2. Advance the amount of AT&T/Cingular's early termination fee. This is $175.

  3. Either advance the amount of AT&T/Cingular's activation fee, or waive any T-Mobile activation fees up to the cost of this amount. Also, waive any additional new-service or interrupted-service fees.

  4. Offer me a rate plan that is consistent with, in terms of included usage (i.e., should be no less than) and price (i.e., should be no more than), my AT&T/Cingular service plan, and arrange the two-year agreement to have begun on the day I canceled my T-Mobile service.
These four steps would put me in a similar position with T-Mobile as I am now with AT&T/Cingular had I not canceled my service, i.e., with a new handset and be two months into a new two-year service agreement with no additional out-of-pocket expense.

However, to entice me to drop AT&T/Cingular and return to T-Mobile, there would have to be an additional incentive beyond putting me in a similar position with you as a provider. An incentive is designed to place someone in a better position than he or she would have been in due to the change, and because of T-Mobile’s carelessness in demonstrating my value as a long-time customer.

I would like this incentive to be cash, in the amount of my total expenses incurred in becoming an AT&T/Cingular customer. This would be the price of my iPhone 3G (16GB), two months’ worth of service/usage fees, and start-up fees.

Please contact me further only if you agree to the terms set forth above, and I would be happy to calculate the correct amount of my incentive package, as well as provide copies of AT&T/Cingular statements and documentation so that you can verify.

If you do not agree to my terms, please remove me from your mailing lists. I am not interested in being advised of future offers.

Best regards,

LBD

Meh. Who knows, maybe I'll have a G1 to give as a Christmas gift in a week or so.
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  • 17 comments

  • don't trvst anyone

    Met a guy today with a Peace dollar to sell. Usually I don't arrange meetings for just one coin, but this one was a date I've been looking for…

  • wish i could slow it

  • adventures in craigslisting

    I've returned to coin collecting after a hiatus of several years. One way I find coins is by perusing local CL ads. For some reason the weird factor…